Mating in Captivity

What it is about

In Mating in Captivity, Esther Perel explores how domestic intimacy prizes safety and transparency, while desire often needs distance, mystery, and otherness. The book helps partners see why “still loving” can coexist with “not wanting,” and challenges reducing desire problems to technique failure or insufficient love.

Questions it can answer

• Why can love stay while desire fades in a long relationship?
• How do safety, routine, and total transparency change erotic interest?
• What kinds of distance and otherness can sit inside a committed bond?

What you will not find

• A how-to for affairs
• A medical protocol for sexual dysfunction
• A dedicated chapter on East Asian multigenerational housing